Bumper stickers

Bumper stickers drive me nuts (no pun intended). I don't think it's very smart to slap your personal political and social views on the back of your vehicle. I think our society has enough issues with road rage. I don't need someone mowing me down because I think we should all Coexist or because of who I voted for last November.

I probably wouldn't ever have a bumper sticker. Except for maybe this. Or this. I would probably stick it on my van. Because that's hilarious. And I just gave all of you Christmas ideas. Ha!

With all that said, I am a bumper sticker reader. I look for them, I get pull close at red lights to red them, etc. Some sort of sick masochistic disease. And I thought with each post, I would share a few of the bumper stickers that I saw each day. Just because I share them doesn't mean I agree with them. It's just merely that I saw them. And since I'm just starting this, I'll share some past ones that have stuck with me:

"Honk if I'm paying your mortgage!"

"I'm only speeding because I really have to poop."

Totally funny, but seriously, WHY would you stick that on a vehicle???

Feel free to play along. What bumper stickers are stuck on your car or have you seen lately?

I am a Calamity

ca⋅lam⋅i⋅ty 
1. a great misfortune or disaster, as a flood or serious injury.

My adventure at Target today wasn't exactly a flood or serious injury, but the word "calamity" kept popping into my head.

I needed body wash. I was in the aisle smelling all the different kinds. I have always hated the smell of Dove, but there was a new kind that I thought it might smell different. I took it off the shelf and flipped open the top.

It squirted down the front of my shirt.

I rubbed it in. Thankfully I was wearing a sweater so it wasn't noticeable at all.

Then I put it to my nose and gave the bottle a little squeeze to get a whiff. (You should think I would have just smelled my hand after rubbing it into my sweater, huh?)

It squirted again, this time up my nose and all over my hands.

I stood there, praying to God that no one was watching this, not sure what to do with the soap all over my hands.

I was wearing dark pants so I couldn't rub my hands on them and I had no tissues in my purse.

So, I had no choice.

I had to rub it into my hands like lotion.

Augh.

And in case you were wondering, it didn't smell different. It was the same old Dove smell that I hate. And I was just getting started on my little shopping adventure, so I had to walk through the whole store smelling that.

Ick.

Not my child Monday!

It's that time again folks! Where I tell you along with MckMama and the other 200 people all the things my children did not do this week.


Bubba did not fall asleep getting out of his bed tonight. And if he did, I probably would put him back in his bed safely and not run for my camera and laugh at his expense along with Peanut.

Peanut did not laugh so hard while I was reading him Jerry Seinfeld's book "Halloween" tonight that he actually fell off his bed. (No DNA test needed, he's mine!)

At a wedding this weekend, Bubba most certainly did not pinch his nose and snort loudly during the vows. And if he did, the college aged guys sitting next to us probably wouldn't have laughed until they had tears rolling out of their eyes.

At the reception, Peanut did not use the port-a-potty (everything was outdoors!) and then come out and announce that he got poop on his sleeve.

What did your kids not do this week??

Under the weather/Other weekend happenings

Today Bubba is a little under the weather. He has a fever and no other symptoms (besides the whiny drama that typically accompanies a fever), so I'm assuming it's just a virus that will soon be gone. He just fell asleep in his popcorn. Poor baby!

We attended a wedding yesterday and he suddenly felt warm at the reception and wanted to go home. Trophy Hub took his temp when we got home and it was 102.2! So we gave him some Tylenol and put him to bed. He checked him again a few more times before we went to bed and it was slowly coming down. And it's been up and down all day today too.

I swear, as soon as we get some crisp air that child's health goes in the pooper. I always worry about him because he is so thin, it's harder for him to ward off illness. On a positive note, he seems to have gotten taller all of a sudden! I put him in 3t pants yesterday. I'm happy to report that the length was perfect and so was the waist - after I tightened the adjustable waist as far as it would go!

Peanut is a bruit and gets over illnesses in a matter of hours. He too has had a growth spurt and his growing out of his old clothes and into his new ones. This usually happens closer to his birthday (December), but this year it seems fitting with him starting school. Everyone tells us how tall he is. He's going to be taller than me by the time he's in 2nd grade!

Yesterday morning, I heard the boys get up so I drug my butt sprung out of bed to find them laying on the couch together. It was so cute, but by the time I got my camera out, Bubba was sitting up and not cooperating for the shot. Surprisingly though - usually it's Peanut that is camera shy.

Speaking of cameras, I'm still using the old 5.1MP Sony camera. Grrrr. The good news is that I'm looking at the camera I would like to have on eBay. There are plenty to bid on, so hopefully I'll have a new one soon. Don't tell Trophy Hub. Oops, I guess he does read this.

I have some exciting news coming! (No, I'm not pregnant.) I have decided to start on a new venture and I'm excited to share it with you all. I don't have all my ducks in a row quite yet, so I will share as soon as I do!

And lastly, have you ever heard a voice on video and think to yourself "Augh! Who is that?" And then realize it was you? Uhhh, no. Me neither. Ahem.

Five Question Friday!

Lisa did this today and I thought it looked like fun! Head on over to My Little Life to see every one's 5 questions and play along too!

1. What celebrity have you been told you look like?

Kellie Martin. You know, Corky's sister. And actress in about 8738743 Lifetime movies.

2. What is your all time favorite movie, any special reason why?

Along Came Polly. Love it, love it, love it. I think I like it so much because like Polly & Rueben in the movie, when Trophy Hub and I first met, we appeared to be so different. I didn't think I had anything in common with him, but our hearts were so drawn to each other. And it's freakin' funny. :-)

3. Since we're talkin' movies...Popcorn: overrated, underrated, or 'bout right?

Love popcorn. My mom bought us a Stir-Crazy last year and it's nearly worn out.

4. Are you a glass half empty or half full kinda person?

I'm totally moody. Depends on the day. Or hour.

5. What perfume/cologne do you wear?

None. If I do, all I can think about all day is how I smell. I don't get anything else done. So, I shower, lather up with Nivea lotion and I'm good to go.

Being 2

Being 2 is really hard work. So hard in fact that when you sleep you look like this:

Vitamin D

So, Dr. Oz said that Vitamin D is a great way to ward off the flu. Sure, he was talking about H1N1, but I'm not going to get myself too caught up in that hype. In general, I like to be healthy and take precautions for myself and my tater tots so we don't get sick.

Since we probably won't get much sunshine when we really need the vitamin D, I did some research on some foods that are rich in D. I care about you all, so I wanted to share with you the top five - they are: cod liver oil, mushrooms, salmon, mackerel and sardines.

Ummm...I think I'll just take a multi-vitamin and call it good.

Intelligent dinner conversation

Bubba: "If you step in dog poop, you have to get the hose and wash it off. That would be so gross."

Me: "Uh-huh. That's right. Now please eat your chicken."

Parenting tip #847

Want to know how to keep a clingy 2 year old busy? Give him junk mail and a shredder. He loves to "buzz" paper for me. And I have time to get the kitchen clean!

"not me" monday! (or tuesday)

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

First of all, I am most certainly not posting a "not me" Monday post on Tuesday, because I am always prompt. I would never post something a day late. Ever. Nope, not me!

On the way to my parents house last weekend, I did not get pulled over by a state trooper. I am always a law-abiding citizen that never speeds.

During a meeting with one of my biggest clients, the under wire in my bra did not pop. I always buy very expensive bras from Victoria's Secret that would never pop for no reason. I am not one of those people that buy $10 Hanes bras from Wal-Mart. Nope, not me!

When asked by Bubba what I had instead of a penis, I did not act like I didn't hear him and change the subject. I always face all the questions my children have and answer them honestly.

Head on over to MckMama's blog to see what everyone else hasn't been doing this week! Enjoy!

Apples

Why is it that Bubba looks like this for a picture with me...

...and like this for a picture with Trophy Hub?

Because he likes the photographer better, right? Come on, lie to me!

Anyway...

I'm a little late posting the pics (because my good camera is broken and I'm using an old one that I HATE so I'm not all that excited about any of my pictures, but I digress) from our trip to the apple orchard last weekend. We had a great time. The weather was perfect and the apples were awesome. And I even got Peanut to pose for a pic!

And you are how old?

Peanut to Trophy Hub:

"You are the best daddy in the tri-state area!"

He's my lobster!

Seven years ago today was the happiest day of my life. That day, I married my best friend. So much has happened in the 7 years since I asked him to accept me as his wife.

He knows the reason for every smile, every tear and loves me as imperfect as I am.

He gets my humor and my moods (although he may not always like them).

He can always make me laugh.


We have known the joy of having babies and we have felt the sorrow of losing one.

I have watched him grow from a guy to a man and from a nervous young father into an awesome dad.

I have watched him grow confident in his profession and become an elected official at a very young age.

We have laughed until we cried and cried until we laughed.

It will always be him. It will always be us. He's my lobster!

Whew!

My workout today was exhausting...for Bubba?? One minute he's looking around chatting with me and the next minute he's collapsed. So when we got home I left him here for a little bit while I sat on the porch and read a magazine. Fabulous.

Rudeness

Oprah said in one of her shows that you show your true colors by how you treat people that serve you. I don't bow down to Oprah, but I happen to agree with her 100%. Having worked in the area of customer service for the last 15 years or so I know how it feels when someone is unnecessarily rude to me.

Today Bubba and I went into town to grab a few groceries and some top soil for some fall gardening we are doing. We stopped at Wendy's for lunch and witnessed a woman having a temper tantrum because the cashier almost didn't give her a medium fry and drink like she had paid for. ALMOST. He caught it before he even gave it to her. She was rolling her eyes, sighing heavily and looking around in disgust. It was one of the most ridiculous things I have ever seen. I think she wanted someone to agree with her that the man working at the register was a complete moron, but I only saw one moron - and that was HER.

If I didn't have my son with me I would have told her she was a moron and I would have told the guy at the register that I was sorry he had to put up with people like her. Seriously...is that her biggest problem? That the order guy at Wendy's didn't get it exactly right? Wow.

Bear

And the latest in the " 'Oh, no he didn't' news"...read this. I would have gone mama bear on his ass.

That reminds me of this:

In this life I'm a woman.

In my next life, I'd like to come back as a bear.

When you're a bear, you get to hibernate.

You do nothing but sleep for six months.

I could deal with that.

Before you hibernate, you're suppose to eat yourself stupid.

I could deal with that too.

When you're a girl bear, you birth your children (who are the size of walnuts) while you're

sleeping and wake up to partially grown, cute, cuddly cubs.

I could definitely deal with that.

If you're a mama bear, everyone knows you mean business.

You swat away anyone who bothers your cubs.

If your cubs get out of line, you swat them too.

I could deal with that.

If you're a bear, your mate expects you to wake up growling.

He expects that you will have hairy legs and excess body fat.

Yup, gonna be a bear.

Dog tired

I'm tired. I have no idea what my problem is, but I'm just tired. I'm beginning to think that I have adrenal fatigue or my thyroid medication needs to be adjusted. It's probably the latter. Or maybe I just need more sleep. Who knows.

Peanut is having a ball in kindergarten. In typical Peanut fashion, he loves it, he loves everyone and now has 11 girlfriends. The only thing he wasn't thrilled about was the mandatory rest time. "Mrs. Meyer told me I had to take a nap." This child is not a big sleeper and hasn't taken naps since before his 3rd birthday. So to be a big boy going to kindergarten, he finds it ridiculous that he should have to take a nap. Looking at it that way, I can't say I blame him.

And Mr. Independent doesn't want us walking him into school either. "You can just drop me off, Mom. I know where my class is." Other kids are clinging to their moms, screaming and Sam wants dropped off in the parking lot. I guess it's better off this way. Bubba will be screaming and clinging, so I'll have my fun with that in a few years.

My camera died so our life in pictures is on hold for now. That is part of the reason for my lapse in posts. I usually have great pics to share. I need to bite the bullet and get a new one, but I would rather shell out $700 or so and get a really nice one than spend a couple hundred on a crappy one that I'll be unhappy with. Any suggestions on cameras? Our old one was a Canon and I really liked it for the most part. We bought it about a week before Ben was born and it's already outdated. It's only 6 megapixels and I think the ones for sale now are 10 or 12.

That's the update from Minivan Mafia Central.